The case for seclusion

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…there is a case to be made for seclusion. Intentional community can backfire!

I have said that I am not built for seclusion, I am hard wired for community. I am hard wired to be social. But I have – often times – felt that seclusion is the way to go. Larry Crabb wrote a book called “Connecting” in which he argues that we were all created by God to have a connection with others. It certainly appears that most people desire some form of connection with all the social media that is out there. So why is seclusion so appealing to some people? Could I live that way? Sometimes I think so and sometimes I think not. Lets look at some pros and cons of seclusion.

Pros

  1. People won’t know as much about you so they won’t talk behind your back. *However people like to talk so most-likely they will just make up stuff to say about you behind your back.
  2. Not hearing about all the talking behind your back.
  3. More time to accomplish my goals instead of helping others accomplish theirs.
  4. Not getting hurt when people leave or betray you.
  5. Not having your life dictated to you by others.
  6. Not having other people’s drama invade your space.
  7. Secluded and socially inept authors are usually the most successful professionally.

Cons

  1. Being alone in the doctor’s office when you receive bad news. *However some wives have told me that when they’ve received bad news their husbands didn’t know how to comfort them and became more of a burden so I think I’d prefer to be alone than to still feel alone when I’m not. But still, being alone in that situation is hard.
  2. I like having people to talk to when I am going through things.
  3. I get lonely when I haven’t received a text in a couple of hours…how would I feel if I never received one ever again?
  4. I’m somewhat of a narcissist, I believe I have something important to say and contribute and everyone should listen to me. If I am in seclusion forever, there will be no one to listen.
  5. I am built to be social so there would always be the feeling that something is missing if I am not social.
  6. I’ve been told by smart people that I have a heart for service…If that is true, I would not be true to my heart if I didn’t have people in my life to serve.
  7. No one to laugh with.

Do the pros outweigh the cons? Or are the cons more compelling? At the moment I am just going to call it a draw.

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One thought on “The case for seclusion

  1. I have wandered the same thing. I believe that all throughout the Bible it is shown that everyone is in need of others, not just Adam specificaly. Paul wrote scripture, holy writings, according to Peter. Many times in these letters the Holy Spirit had him share his desire to have comfort. The very fact that he was in communication shows that I need to stay in communication with others. I could say a lot more but this is all I have to say right now to you so please consider this and I will too consider what I know to be true but find it very hard pressing through to the goal that God has in mind for me both daily and for later, even far far later into eternity. Prep time, and in the moment I Cor. 13

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