It’s always the same old story. People are looking for love. I work with teenagers mentoring them and they are so worried about being alone that they will date and date and date until they’ve totally lost themselves and they’ve completely lost sight of God’s plan for their lives. In fact – in most cases, they’ve stopped looking for God’s plan all together because they are so wrapped up in their own plans. I always tell them that dating, although fun, shouldn’t be their focus. I am speaking from experience because I’ve been there and done that. I am 32 years old and still looking for love. I know how frustrating and discouraging it is to wait. I know how lost you can get in the hoping and daydreaming. I know how off-track it can take you from God.
I recently came to the conclusion that it is not healthy for me to be in a romantic relationship. I have such a hard time focusing on God anyway that adding another person for me to focus on just muddies the waters even more than they already are. I have lost myself and God while in relationships because my focus was completely off. I am not against marriage or love, I just know where I am now spiritually and I am aware of my struggles and I can’t afford…my soul can’t afford…for me to lose myself and God again.
I still daydream about love…especially in the Autumn when I am more prone to fall in love…but I know that for now I am single for a reason – whatever that may be – and I have to be content where I am.
11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:11-13)
We shouldn’t worry so much about finding love on this earth in the companionship of other people – people will sometimes leave you. We should be content where we are and we should focus more on who we are in Christ because He is the only one we can rely on fully and only in Him and His strength can we do all things.
Matthew 6:33 says, “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well, ” which tells me that my focus should be on God and his call for me and all my blessings will come from that – whether the blessing is a loving, romantic relationship on earth or eternal singleness. “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'” (Jeremiah 29:11) And one thing I have learned – mostly the hard way – is that the story God writes for me is a million times better than any story I could ever write for myself.