So, there had to be a reason, right? I somewhat see a reason. I just don’t like it. Well, that’s not entirely true. I liked it for a while. But it was only temporary. Why did it have to be temporary? I have to let it go. It’s no longer relevant. I have to be done. But everytime…I get sucked back in. No! Not again! I’m done! There is more! I am determined to find more. I worry that my walls are going back up. I have to fight that rebuilding process. It’s not healthy. It’s the way of the heart though. You self-preserve with walls until you see a legitimate reason to not need them anymore until that legitimate reason becomes irrelevant, then you build them again. How do you fight the rebuild when the reason for the demolition is no longer relevant? How do you fight the rebuild process when you find out that the reason for the demolition wasn’t as legitimate as you had hoped? There had to be a greater purpose. I need to find it and be okay with it.

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